ABOUT ME
• crazy but not wild
• Devoted
• Loved
• I'm addicted to my bunshin, music, writing, my bunshin, bleach, pictures, did i say my bunshin yet?
• I love to dance... i move.
• I'm fascinated with anime
• I love rainy Monday mornings
• I dream of a simple life
• I love traveling
• I stay home simply to spend time with my family
• I recently got bitten by the computer bug
• I love theater
• I have deep affection for dogs
• I love drawing but drawing seems to have developed a mild aversion towards me
• If given a chance, I'd go to VIENNA!
• I love my bunshin
• I love hugging
• When deeply saddened or undeniably happy, i write.
• my life is an unwritten book filled with wonderful adventures
contact >> ♥ miaka ♥
Saturday, June 28, 2008
From a Cynic's point of View (?)
Never expect too much. When you do, you end up facing failed expectations with no way or surviving. The deepest sadness can be felt at the realization that this is all but a vicious cycle. To expect and be let down. To be hit by the undeniable fact that no one can ever make you happy but yourself. No one.
There will be days when you think this is all just part of a cynic's point of view. Because when you learn to depend on someone... you allow yourself to be pulled by the intense desire and temptation of letting yourself go... fully. Allow yourself to fall, plummet through heights unknown knowing there is someone to catch you. Someone to fill that aching void of solitude you thought you'll never fill.
And someone does catch you... holds you in his arms and makes you feel safe. You find yourself baring more of yourself. Trusting... depending... expecting.
And then expectations will rise to a level that can't be met and you get hurt. You think its all the other's fault. You think he should have done more. He should have met all expectations with no mistakes whatsoever.
And that is your biggest mistake.
To think your other half is perfect. that he will never hurt you. that he will never do something that would bring your world upside down.
And so you feel angry. At him... but more at yourself for being vulnerable. For expecting too much. For depending too much.
But most importantly, for losing yourself in him...
Because when you do... its so difficult to get yourself back.
So no expectations. Never lose yourself... love but love yourself more. Because once you let yourself go... there's a chance you won't get yourself back.
No one can make you happy but yourself.
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