ABOUT ME
• crazy but not wild
• Devoted
• Loved
• I'm addicted to my bunshin, music, writing, my bunshin, bleach, pictures, did i say my bunshin yet?
• I love to dance... i move.
• I'm fascinated with anime
• I love rainy Monday mornings
• I dream of a simple life
• I love traveling
• I stay home simply to spend time with my family
• I recently got bitten by the computer bug
• I love theater
• I have deep affection for dogs
• I love drawing but drawing seems to have developed a mild aversion towards me
• If given a chance, I'd go to VIENNA!
• I love my bunshin
• I love hugging
• When deeply saddened or undeniably happy, i write.
• my life is an unwritten book filled with wonderful adventures
contact >> ♥ miaka ♥
Monday, December 25, 2006
walking...
its christmas. the lights are bright, people are out celebrating and the evening is cool. I had a choice of whether i stay home or go to work. I chose the latter for practical reasons. Knowing i would most probably do nothing at work, i decided to make the most of it anyways.
its christmas and i decided to take a walk. i also decided to take that walk alone. i guess i needed some time to think and breath in fresh air. Seeing the beautiful sky, the bright lights contrasting it... the lively conversations between people... made me think... made me yearn... made me wish. I wish i wasnt walking alone. I wish I wasn't appreciating the beautiful sky all by myself. I wish....
I'm yearning for a lot of things tonight. I'm yearning for the presence of a loved one. I'm wishing i could share the simple things christmas has to offer.... I'm wishing i could give him something for christmas that he would like. But i can't. And somehow, the knowledge made me sad.
I've told myself I'm strong. That i can take the distance. That my heart can hold on. There are only moments when this belief would falter. This is one of those few moments. I try hard to fight it. Keep my attention on other things that can make me smile. I found solace in a child's laughter. Perhaps this is His way of reminding me to be strong. I'll take that.
He often wonders if he is enough for me. If he could provide me with everything i need. Right now, I wonder if I'm enough for him. If my love is what he deserve. I know in my heart that he deserves to be happy. Would i be able to make him happy?
I can't give him anything else but my love. Nothing else but me. I hope that's enough.
Its christmas. And my thoughts are filled with yearning.
Perhaps i should take a walk again.
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